Adventures of the Drunk and Disorderly
by LostInCharliesEyes
Summary: Short series. Kurt, Puck, Mercedes, Tina, and Brittany play Never Have I Ever, get trashed, and cause a teensy bit of mayhem. Some Kurt/Puck romance/drunken fun. So watch out for the slashiness if you don't like it. You've been warned.
1. Cookie Dough

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

Author's Note: This is a very short little series. The entire thing will take place in about 10 hours or so.

"Never have I ever-" Mercedes pauses, to think. "Never have I ever stolen anything."

Kurt takes a small sip of his rum and coke. Puck takes a drink.

"I have to admit, it's starting to taste better," Kurt says, looking in his cup.

"That's cause you're buzzed," Brittany says, then adds, "What did you steal?"

"Just an ascot. I was 7 so I didn't get in much trouble," Kurt answers. Tina is on Mercedes left so she sets down her drink and crosses her right leg over her left.

"Never have I ever watched porn," she says. Puck takes a drink, smirking at Tina. Kurt hesitantly takes a sip and Mercedes and Puck burst out laughing.

"You watched porn?" Puck shouts, unable to contain his amusement.

"Just once and it was bad," Kurt whispers, his face flushing red with embarrassment.

"That's awesome," Puck says, shaking his head.

"That does not leave this room!" Kurt commands, standing up and pointing directly at Puck.

"What? I wouldn't dare tell anyone you jacked off to bad porn," Puck smirks.

"I never said I-"

"Of course you didn't," Puck says, winking at Kurt when he settles back on the couch.

"Never have I ever jacked off to porn," Kurt states, glaring at Puck. He raises his bottle as if toasting Kurt and takes a long swig of his beer. Kurt groans and turns to Brittany because it's her turn.

"Never have I ever watched a fashion show," Brittany says, her eyes drifting to a spot on the wall. Everyone else drinks. Even Puck.

"Never have I ever. . . eaten a whole roll of cookie dough," Puck says, putting up one finger and leaving the room. Everyone else drinks. Puck comes back from the kitchen with a roll of cookie dough. He fights to open it, but eventually tosses it across the circle to Kurt, who quickly opens it and hands it to Brittany.

"Never have I ever fantasized about the same sex," Mercedes says and Kurt throws a pillow at her, knowing she directed that question at him. Kurt, Tina and Brittany take innocent little sips of their drink. Then, to everyone's surprise, Puck takes a drink as well.

"HOLD UP!" Mercedes yells, turning to Puck. "Who?"

"Why should I tell you?" Puck asks, now red as a cherry.

"Cause if you don't, I'll hit you upside the head and tell your little football buddies what you really think about in the locker room-"

"Kurt," Puck murmurs under his breath. For a second, Mercedes can't believe her ears.

"Did you really just say Kurt?" Mercedes bursts.

"Why'd you say it so loud?" Puck shouts, glancing at Kurt who's staring in disbelief. "It was just once. When you were teaching us the Single Ladies dance. You were in your football uniform and your pants were all tight. . ." He drifts off, putting his face in his hands.

"I can't believe you said that," Kurt finally whispers, disrupting the awkward silence.

"You're telling me," Puck groans. "Moving on. Tina?"

"Oh, uh, yeah. Never have I ever had sex in my parent's bed," Tina says, glancing at Puck, who takes a drink. Brittany sips from her beer as well.

"Never have I ever had someone say they fantasized about me," Kurt smirks.

"Bottoms up," Puck says and takes a drink.

I promise they'll be drunk in the next chapter.


	2. Swings and Snogging

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

1 hour and many drinks later. . .

"Oh my gosh! I FUCKING LOVE YOU GUYS!" Kurt wails, practically jumping into Puck's arms. They had managed to end up at the fair. How? None of them could tell you that exactly. They were all so drunk, they could barely walk in a wavy line, much less a straight one.

"I LOVE YOU TOO KURT!" Puck cried, now carrying Kurt bridal style. Kurt has his arms around Puck's neck in some kind of death grip.

"Let's tell everyone else in Glee how much we love them!"

"Yay yay yay yay yay!" Brittany hollers, pulling out her cell phone. She presses her speed dial and Santana picks up on the second ring.

"Brittany I'm kind of in the middle of something, did you forget how to open the fridge again? Sweetie just pull on the black part-" She stops when she hears Kurt and Puck laughing. "Uh what's going on?"

"We just called to say WE LOVE YOU!" Brittany yells. She closes her phone before Santana can reply. They continue to call everyone, but none are quite as fun as Finn and Rachel.

"Hey Puck," Finn says.

"We love you Finn! SO MUCH!" Puck and Tina yell into the phone.

"And I love Puck!" Kurt shouts.

"Uh. . . I love you guys too?" Finn says slowly. "Have you guys been drinking?"

"So much rum and coke! It's so yummy! Puck's carrying me! It's so fun! He's so strong! And muscle-y! He's like Superman except he doesn't have a cape! And he can't fly. And he doesn't wear tights. But he's still super, even if they kick him out of the super hero club!"

"Kurt. Breathe in between sentences. Please don't pass out."

"I won't. I promise! Can we get married Puck?"

"Wait-" Puck closes the phone before Finn can finish. The only person with Rachel's number was Puck so Kurt took his phone and called her.

"Puck, I'm with Jesse now. I will not-"

"HI RACHEL!" Kurt squeals.

"Hi. . . Kurt?"

"Oh my gosh Rach. It's been so long. Like hours or something. We called to say we love you. Or sorta love you. I don't really love you, but I kinda like respect you." Mercedes takes the phone from Kurt.

"Hey girl! Kurt is so funny when he's drunk! He's considering marrying Puck!"

"Marrying Puck? Don't they hate each other?"

"They did, but then we got wasted and they seem to be convinced they're in love or something. Gotta go girl, I wanna be the maid of honor!"

At this point many people are staring at the group, but they're completely unaware. Well, Kurt and Puck are probably the ones attracting more attention because they've begun kissing.

"Oh my god we have to go on the swings!" Brittany shouts, though it sounds a bit more like "ohmagood wehavetogoonswings!"

"To the swings!" Tina yells and they all run over. Tina and Brittany sit in swings side by side and Mercedes pushes them. Puck had moved slower, making the kiss last as long as possible. He hesitantly sets Kurt on a swing. After another quick peck on the lips, Puck pushes him.

"WEEEEEE!" Kurt and Brittany yell in drunken excitement.

"I'M GONNA THROW UP NOAH!"

"You wanna go up more?" Puck asks. Clearly there are some communication issues. Puck pushes him higher. After a moment of nauseating passes, Kurt puts down his feet to stop himself. He then proceeds to throw up on Puck's shoes.

"On my shoes? Why on my shoes?"

"I'm sorry Noah. I didn't mean to."

"That's okay Kurt. I'll just leave them here."

"Okay. I'll be right back." Kurt goes into the bathroom to wash out his mouth. He walks back out to find Puck sitting in the swing mourning his shoes. "I'm sorry about your shoes."

"They were just so pretty."

"I'll buy you new ones."

"YOU WILL? Oh my gosh. I love you Kurt Hummel," Puck says, now hugging Kurt's legs.

"I love you too Noah Puckerman. Will you give me a piggy-back ride?"

"Sure kid," Puck says offering his back for Kurt to hop on. Kurt excitedly clings to him and places a little kiss where Puck's neck meets his shoulder. Puck turns his head to kiss Kurt's lips.

"I'm gonna be their maid of honor," Mercedes tells Tina and Brittany.

"I wanna be their maid of honor!" Tina whines.

"Can I be the best man?" Brittany asks, poking Puck's barf shoes with her own.

"Yeah that's great!" Mercedes squeals with enthusiasm.

"I'll wear a tuxedo dress! It'll be SO COOL!"

"Ahhh! I'm so excited! You guys are my best friends ever! Did I tell you I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!" Tina shouts. Hugs and "I LOVE YOU"s are shared for a minute. Kurt and Puck are still snogging, but now Kurt is infront of him with his legs wrapped around Puck's waist. This is making some people slow down as they walk by. They can't help themselves. This is Lima, Ohio. Two guys making out in public is extremely strange. Puck's hands on Kurt's ass aren't helping.

"Guys I wanna go. . . What's that game where you throw that ball and it rolls on the ground and then hits those things at the end and then disappears?" Brittany asks.

"Bowling! OH MY GOSH WE HAVE TO GO!"

"Yeah, that's what it's called. I have a friend who'll serve us beer there."

"Really? Puck! Kurt! We're going bowling!"

"Bowling? That's awesome. You're awesome. How did you get so awesome?" Puck blabbers, before Kurt kisses him more. Puck loses his balance and falls over. They lay there for an entire minute.

They take the bus to the bowling alley. Well, they actually get off a stop late, but eventually they end up at the bowling alley. They down a few beers in the bathroom and proceed to bowl without bowling shoes or a specific lane. Actually their shoes are gone. Mercedes is pretty sure they left them on the bus. After attempting to act out the scene in the bowling alley from the movie Across The Universe, they attract the attention of an employee. When they all try sliding down the lanes as balls go by, they are forcibly removed from the building. Once they're outside, they wander down the street for a while.

Kay, reviews would make me much more eager to post. Thanks for reading my loves.


	3. Cheetos and Rockstar

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

Super short chapter. Sorry.

11:15 pm

"We should join the French Foreign Legion," Kurt says as he attempts to walk on a foot tall wall. He keeps falling off.

"What's that?" Puck asks, completely enthralled by the idea.

"I don't know. I just thought it sounded fun."

"Okay, Puck. Here's what you gotta do. I think you look oldest so they won't freak out if you go in drunk. Go in the liquor store over there," Tina says, pointing in the wrong direction. "You gotta buy some Cheetos and Rockstar."

"I don't have any money," Puck whines, turning his head to watch Kurt and Brittany crawling on the ground. Mercedes is egging them on from her seat on the foot tall wall. She laughs and falls back in the grass.

"Here," Tina says, handing him 40 dollars. She has no idea that's a lot of money at the moment. Puck walks over to the liquor store. He pushes on the door. It won't open. He leans into it, thinking it's just stuck. "Pull Puck!"

Puck pulls open the door and gives Tina a thumbs up. He comes back with 3 bags of Cheetos, 12 Rockstar Punched Guava, and a bag of rock candy. They sit in the middle of the nearly empty road and eat all the Cheetos, drink 8 of the Rockstars, and devour all the rock candy.

**Reviews would be GREATLY appreciated. They're like hugs, or crack. Oh and I think I'm gonna change the rating to mature just to be safe. I want you to keep reading, I just don't think this is a good example for teenagers or whatever. I'm just talking shit. Changing the rating. That's all. Thanks for reading. Love ya.**


	4. Fuckin' Bitches and Prada Shoes

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

Oh and a little bit of singing. It's Glee afterall. Oh and Mercedes' and Kurt's potty mouths are the main cause of the mature rating. That and Kurt's desire to screw Puck. By the way, I have never been drunk and therefore don't know what it feels like to be drunk and have had no drunken mistakes. If something is not accurate, please don't penalize me for bad info I have received on the topic.

1:35 am

They manage to walk down the road without getting hit by a car or throwing up. Contrary to popular belief, caffeine does nothing to sober you up. It just makes you a wide awake drunk.

"Bitches! My fuckin' bitches! I fucking love you! You know how I do!" Mercedes sings. Tina and Brittany join in as they just repeat the same verse over and over.

Convinced he can do anything, Kurt is attempting to climb a tree. His feet scramble uncoordinatedly for a moment before he falls out of the tree and he and Puck burst out laughing. Kurt takes a few minutes to stand up.

"_Yeah...  
Uh huh  
So seductive"_Kurt starts singing, to no one in particular.

"_I'll take you to the candy shop  
I'll let you lick the lollipop  
Go 'head girl, don't you stop  
Keep going 'til you hit the spot"_

"What the hell Kurt?" Puck asks, cocking his head to the side. Puck's still sitting in the grass. Kurt gets closer to Puck. Closer and closer. Then BOOM. Crotch in the face.

"_I'll take you to the candy shop  
Boy one taste of what I got  
I'll have you spending all you got  
Keep going 'til you hit the spot"_

Kurt 'drops it low. He doesn't go back up though, because he is a) dizzy as fuck and b) quite enjoying his closeness with Puck. Puck has forgotten how to breathe. Kurt kisses him and air suddenly comes back to his lungs. Their tongues both fight for dominance, Kurt being the clear winner. He leans into the kiss and Puck moves with him till he's lying on his back.

"I'm honestly surprised this didn't happen sooner," Brittany says, sitting on the ground watching Kurt take it to second base.

"What do you mean?" Mercedes inquires, pulling out her cell phone to video their make out session.

"I mean they've always had all that sexual tension between them. It was just a matter of time before they acted on it," Brittany explains like she thinks it's common knowledge.

"She's smarticle," Tina whispers to Mercedes, who erupts in a fit of giggles. Puck is doing his best to get Kurt's shirt off, but there are multiple layers and they're pretty determined to stay on Kurt. His shirt with sunglasses comes off, then Puck unbuttons his collared shirt. It's gray with polka dots is all the information he absorbs before he throws the shirt away from them.

"TAKE IT OFF BABY!" Brittany yells. Mercedes and Tina join in her enthusiasm about their getting naked. Puck and Kurt don't realize that their friends are watching. Kurt actually forgot they were there entirely. Their alcohol and caffeine drenched minds just want to tear off their clothes and have at each other.

"Wait. Should we stop them?" Tina asks Mercedes. Tina didn't drink at the bowling alley and was beginning to feel a little more sober. Very wide awake sober after her third Rockstar.

"I don't know. They look so happy," she says, opening another Rockstar. She takes a sip.

"Horny yes but, I'm almost positive we should stop them."

"But- but- but-" Brittany searches for a reason they should stop them besides the fact that she's enjoying it. "Okay. . ."

"Here I go," Mercedes says, stopping the video recording. She stands up with the help of Tina and Brittany. "BITCHES GET YO' HANDS OFF EACH OTHER!" Kurt stops taking off Puck's jeans and goes as red as a cherry.

"How long have you guys been there?" Kurt shouts, falling backwards onto the grass. He starts laughing. "Why do I keep falling? Oh my god! Where the fuck are my clothes? Why is my shirt gone?"

"You're wasted! You were getting ready to screw Puck and I thought you might regret that in the morning," Mercedes says matter-of-factly. "Probably not even a good fuck anyway."

"That's so mean Mercedes!" Kurt attempts to defend Puck, but can't stop laughing. "I'm so wasted! Noah is so wasted! I wanna sing! We should do karaoke! FUCK YEAH! Noah! Can we do karaoke? Oh my god! KARAOKE! CEDES WE GOTTA DO KARAOKE! Noah. I'll fuck you after I promise!" Kurt talks with no filter when he's trashed, if you haven't noticed. Puck groans, but stands up anyway. He puts his clothes back on.

"How long have our shoes been gone?" Puck wonders to himself.

"MY SHOES!" Kurt yells as he realizes he took them off on the bus. "They were Prada! We have to find that bus!"

"I thought we were gonna find a karaoke bar," Puck tip-toes around him incase he decides to lash out at him.

"Oh yeah. To a karaoke bar!"

"Shit he can be scary sometimes." Mercedes nods to herself.

**Okay so karaoke next chapter. I know you're excited. Please review. *hug* *hug* *hug***


	5. Spastic Dancing and Fucking Love

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

I love Kurt, even if he is a psycho in my story. Oh, and since this is my version of Lima, Ohio, there's no curfew and few cops cause I don't want them to get arrested.

2:55 am

"I told you I could find it!" Kurt is very excited.

"Yeah, but you took us in circles first!" Puck is not quite as excited.

"Where are we?" Brittany is confused. What's new?

"A karaoke bar. It's where you get up on stage and sing to a crowd," Tina explains.

"Oh, but if it's a bar don't we need IDs?" Brittany asks, smoothing out her Cheerios uniform.

"No it's a 16 and up place. You only need an ID if you're gonna drink."

"We aren't gonna drink?"

"Well you can, but keep Kurt away from any drinks. He's drunk enough."

They go in the bar. There's a crowd in the back waving their arms from side to side as the singer on stage embarks on two minutes of nanana-nananana. That's what he gets for picking Hey Jude. People at the tables are drinking and because it's so late(or early), teenagers are few and far between. They wait kinda-sorta-not really patiently for their turn. Kurt sings along to all the songs at the choruses and hops around like a psycho. When it's their turn and they actually have to choose a song to sing, they realize they have no idea. Then Puck suggests Shake It by Metro Station and that's the one they choose. They all hop excitedly on stage. The song begins to play and Kurt starts, singing to Puck.

"_Let's drop! Yeah, come on_

_Shake, shake  
I'll take you home if you don't leave me at the front door  
Your body's cold but girl we're getting so warm  
And I was thinking of ways that I could get inside  
Tonight you're falling in love, let me go now  
This feeling's tearing me up, here we go now"_

Puck takes the cue to sing next, while the girls and Kurt dance like maniacs.

"_Now if she does it like this, will you do it like that?  
Now if she touches like this, will you touch her right back?  
Now if she moves like this, will you move her like that?  
Come on, shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it"_

They all jump up and down as Tina sings.

"_Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it"_

Puck points at Mercedes so she sings.

"_Your lips tremble but your eyes are in a straight stare  
We're on the bed but your clothes are laying right there  
And I was thinking of places that I could hide  
Tonight you're falling in love, let me go now  
This feeling's tearing me up, here we go now"_

Puck takes the pause to breathe before singing. He puts his hands on Kurt's hips to move them along with his.

"_Now if she does it like this, will you do it like that?  
Now if she touches like this, will you touch her right back?  
Now if she moves like this, will you move her like that?  
Come on, shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it"_

Commence their jumping.

"_Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it"_

Brittany's turn.

"_I saw you dancing and I couldn't get you off my mind  
I could tell that you could tell that I was taking my time  
But I was thinking of ways to get you staying the night  
Your body's shaking, tell me off so I can turn off the lights"_

Puck one last time.

"_Now if she does it like this, will you do it like that?  
Now if she touches like this, will you touch her right back?  
Now if she moves like this, will you move her like that?  
Come on, shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it"_

And in one more spastic dancing and jumping fest, they all sing:

"_Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it_

Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it  
Shake shake, shake shake, a-shake it"

The crowd cheers for them. They all hold hands to bow. Kurt, in his amazingly wasted stupor, falls of the stage, taking everyone with him.

"I fucking love you Noah," Kurt says as Puck lies there laughing his ass off.

"I fucking love you too Kurt," Puck says, before kissing Kurt's forehead.

**So everybody fucking loves everyone. The ending of this chapter made me all warm and fuzzy inside. Thanks SO much for the reviews. You have no idea what they mean to me. There's nothing better than having someone say they enjoyed something you wrote. You make me smile all over my face. **** So one more chapter and an epilogue. I know, I'm sad too. **** Lots and lots of love. - Kierstyn**


	6. Lizzie and Darcy

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

4:00 am

"I want an omelette. NOAH! Did you just pee on that wall?" Kurt shouts at Puck, horrified.

"I couldn't hold it," Puck says sheepishly.

"An omelette sounds yummy. And olives. And a hamburger. Oh and mozzarella sticks," Brittany says, her hand on her stomach.

"Toast. . ." Mercedes whispers, looking up at the dark sky.

"That's it. We're going to a diner," Tina decides, walking off. They follow her. She leads them to a 50s style diner, where they all crawl into a booth. Kurt sits on Puck's lap while they flip through the menu.

"What's that say?" Kurt asks, squinting at the menu.

"It says. . . I have no idea. It's all blurry," Puck says, handing the menu to Mercedes.

"I can't read this shit," Mercedes shouts and hands the menu to Brittany. Brittany doesn't even look at the menu. She simply hands it across to Tina.

"I don't read. Santana always reads the choices to me," Brittany says, watching as the waitress drags herself to their table. Brittany doesn't know if she's tired or dreading having to deal with a bunch of drunk teenagers.

"My name is Alma. I'll be your waitress this morning. Do you know what you'd like?" the waitress murmurs, staring at Puck and Kurt's intertwined fingers.

"I want an omelette with cheese and eggs!" Kurt declares.

"The omelette is made out of eggs," the waitress drawls, writing his order on her note pad.

"Oh yeah. And chocolate milk. And coffee."

"Okay then."

"I'll have cereal," Brittany says.

"We don't have cereal here miss."

"But I want cereal."

"I can't help with that cause we don't have any."

"But that's what I want," Brittany whines to Tina.

"How about some pancakes Brit?" Tina asks slowly.

"Oooo that sounds good. I'll have pancakes and orange juice," Brittany tells the waitress excitedly.

"French toast, bacon, and coffee," Mercedes says slowly, watching her scribble on the paper.

"I'll have what he's having," Puck tells her, pointing to the boy on his lap. Kurt kisses him and the waitress looks shocked.

"And you?" the waitress asks Tina, doing her best to ignore the boys making out.

"Coffeecake and uh, coffee."

The waitress practically runs away.

"Guys stop making out. You're gonna make the waitress hurl," Tina says.

"Okay," Kurt groans, breaking the kiss. He cuddles into Puck's side and Puck kisses the top of his head. Kurt starts to tear up.

"What's wrong baby?" Puck asks, wiping away his tears.

"It's just, we're never gonna be this way again!"

"Of course we will sweetie," Mercedes croons, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah, don't worry," Tina says, a hand on his other shoulder.

"Noah, are we Jane Austen and Tom Lefroy?" Kurt whispered, looking Puck in the eyes.

"Who?"

"You know, from Becoming Jane. Anne Hathaway and James McAvoy?" He watches as Puck's confusion grows slightly. "They have this amazing, passionate, fleeting romance. It's just so perfect and scandalous, but then it's over. She can't give anything up to be with him. She doesn't want it enough," Kurt explains, his voice forlorn.

"No! That's not us! That's not gonna be us. I wanna be with you. I do. I really do," Puck consoles him, wrapping his arms around Kurt's small body. He rocks slightly back and forth.

"But what about your football friends? And the Cheerios? And the basketball team?"

"They don't matter. Not like you do. If they can't accept this then they aren't real friends. Everything will be okay. I promise." Puck kisses his hair and slowly stops rocking back and forth. Kurt sniffles quietly, nuzzling his face into Puck's shirt.

"Oh my gosh. I love you guys," Mercedes lilts. A few minutes of 'I love you's and hugs pass. Now they're all sniffling and smiling. Gushing about their feelings. The waitress brings their food and quickly departs in order to avoid the emotional display. Kurt takes a bite of his omelette, wiping his eyes with a napkin. Placing a kiss on Kurt's temple, Puck begins to pick at his omelette.

"Do you have any money cause I've got nothing," Puck says when they have to pay the bill. Kurt pulls out 22 dollars to contribute. Mercedes has 15, Tina has 13, and Brittany has 13 cents, 4 paper clips, a button, and lots of pocket lint.

"Noah. . ." Kurt murmurs into his ear.

"Yeah?"

"Are we Lizzie and Darcy then?"

"Those names are familiar. . ."

"Pride and Prejudice. Read it last month in English. Love that lasts."

"I remember them. Yeah, that's us," Puck says, kissing him.

"You guys are so cute. You're gonna make us throw up."

**Okay. One more chapter and then the epilogue. **** Puck and Kurt sure are sickeningly sweet, ay? Anyway… Reviews are appreciated. Till next time, love, peace, and bendy straws 3**


	7. Aliens and Grass Molesters

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the arrangement of the words.

Switch around POVs a bit this chapter in preparation for my next fanfic. Man this is so cheesy.

All your reviews have been amazing. I love you.

5:22 am

Kurt's POV

Lying in a cornfield is nice. The ground is comfier than you'd think. We're in a section of a "crop circle". Whatever the hell they are. Puck is so warm. He's like my own mini sun. Bigger than me, but smaller than the real sun. His hands are so strong and his lips, even stronger. He tastes like sugar. Ooo Pixie Sticks.

Puck's POV

Lying in a cornfield is so peaceful. We're in one of the crop circles the aliens made. Kurt said it would be okay cause aliens don't try to abduct drunk people. I don't completely believe that, but I'll try and trust him. Kurt's skin is so soft. He's like satin pajamas. Wrapped around me and fitting perfectly to the curves of my body. He's so bright, he puts the stars to shame. He would make that blue background fade away so he could be the only one in the sky. More beautiful than anything there before.

Mercedes' POV

Brittany makes funny faces when she is staring at the stars. I've been videoing her facial expressions for the last few minutes and they've ranged from sad to surprised to angry to excited. I should video Kurt and Puck. I turn to lie on my right side. Kurt has his arms and legs wrapped around Puck's torso and Puck is holding Kurt in his arms. They might just be the cutest thing ever. They keep glancing at each other with these intense dreamy eyes then nervously looking away. Too Adorable.

Brittany's POV

Every person I've ever met has said that the stars are beautiful, but I never really realized until now. They're just so pretty and glittery. Like little happy faces looking down at me.

Tina's POV

Being that I've been basically sober for almost 3 hours, I've made sure I got my friends' stupid actions on camera. Lots of skipping and shouting and running into things. On the way to the cornfield many odd drunken mishaps occurred. Here are the highlights: Kurt fell in a fountain at the park. Puck peed on the side of the karaoke bar. Mercedes and Brittany kissed for the camera. Kurt also attempted to swim with no water. He looked like he was molesting the grass. I will have sufficient blackmail for the rest of our lives. Oh look, a shooting star. _I wish none of us would have to deal with hangovers._

**What do you think? Review, review, review! I love them so much. It makes writing worth it. I'm gonna post the epilogue soon so until then, I LOVE YOU. 3**


	8. Epilogue

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or its characters. The song So Happy I Could Die doesn't belong to me either.

I am so excited about my epilogue. I think it's quite good. Switching around POV.

Puck's POV

I walk down the hall and stop next to Kurt's locker. It isn't open and he's nowhere in sight. I glare at the losers who stare at me as they walk by. They've done it everyday for the last month. What's the point now? Hasn't the shock worn off? Santana and Brittany walk by, pinkies locked. They each wave and Santana winks. I was surprised how quickly Santana accepted this. She simply shrugged and said "Screw who you want. I have Brittany." She's not so bad sometimes.

"Hello sir. What, may I ask, are you doing in front of my locker?" Kurt asks.

"I'm waiting for you of course," I say, smiling. I lean down and kiss his forehead adding, "Hey baby."

"Hi," he whispers, his eyes closed. He has a small smile playing on his lips and I can't help but kiss him. That of course attracts the attention of some football players, who gag and pretend to throw up. I kiss Kurt deeper, not only for my own enjoyment, but to show off for the idiots in the hall. I press him up against the locker and slip my tongue in between his eager lips.

"That's disgusting!" I hear some guy yell. I'm too busy attacking Kurt's mouth to hit him. I wrap my arms around his thighs and lift him up. He drapes his legs around me and as I place butterfly kisses on his collar bone, his thighs tighten on my waist.

"Not in the hallway," Kurt breathes. He's right. Everyone has stopped to stare at us.

We relocate to a janitor's closet where he tears my clothes off.

Oh, I bet you're wondering how the morning after we got trashed went. This is how it happened:

"Oh my god! Where are my clothes! These are not my boxers!" Kurt was shouting. I blinked a few times until my vision was clear. Kurt had a hand covering his eyes and was whining about how bright the sun was. I wasn't quite as shaken up. It wasn't my first morning after and definitely not my first hangover. "Man, my ass is killing me." I watched him struggle for a moment, trying to figure out what happened. He stared at me suddenly. "You-you and-and _I. _Oh my gosh. We fucked?"

"I wouldn't call it that. Sounds so unromantic," I said, glancing down at his boxers I had decided to wear. I honestly liked him. I hadn't lied to get in his pants, though getting in his pants was a plus. Best sex I've ever had.

"Oh my gosh. Did I reference fictional characters while eating an omelette last night cause for some reason I remember eating an omelette and calling us Darcy and Lizzie."

"I don't remember. I was just as wasted as you. Okay, maybe not quite as wasted, but I only remember having sex with you," I told him and stood up slowly. "My head hurts so bad."

"Mine too. It feels like it's gonna explode."

Brittany's POV

Santana forgave me for kissing Mercedes. Santana wants to be the only girl I kiss. She gets jealous. That's okay though because I get jealous too sometimes.

"I still can't believe Kurt and Puck are together," she says, as we walk into glee rehearsal.

"I still can't believe Barney can't fly," I tell her and Santana takes my hand and leads me to a seat. I smooth out my Cheerios uniform and lean back in my seat. Santana decides to straddle me. She leans forward to hum in my ear.

"_I love that lavender blonde  
The way she moves  
The way she walks"_

Santana kisses my cheek.

"_So happy I could die  
Be your best friend  
Yeah I'll love you forever  
Up in the clouds  
We'll be higher than ever"_

"I love you too Santana," I tell her and let her kiss my lips.

Tina's POV

"I know, but Love Me Tender is just so much sweeter," I explain to Artie, taking a seat on his lap. We roll into glee rehearsal and stop near the piano.

"Okay then we'll sing it," he agrees to make me happy. I kiss him and he runs his fingers through my hair. I pull reluctantly away, biting at his bottom lip. We aren't fond of PDAs. Unlike Kurt and Puck. They make out in glee all the time. They can't keep their hands off each other. "So you wanna hang out after school?"

"Can't. I'm still grounded."

"Why'd you guys have to get trashed? It's been really unhelpful."

"I know, but I'm still glad it happened. Look how happy Kurt and Puck are. They never would have ended up together if it weren't for that liquid courage," I say, laughing.

"Okay maybe. I've never seen either of them as happy as when they're together."

"Oh my gosh. There was nothing as funny as explaining to everyone what happened. They were all so shocked. At first none of them believed me, but then I showed them the videos."

"You really have to show me those sometime."

Mercedes' POV

I skip the period before glee in order to finish an assignment for English. Because I'm already in the rehearsal room, I watch as everyone arrives. I take a seat between Tina and Brittany. Mr. Schue comes in and immediately notices the missing Kurt and Puck. I had noticed as well, but made the assumption that they had gotten busy in an empty classroom or something. I had chosen not to bring it up, but Schue quickly asks, "Anybody seen Puck and Kurt?"

"Haven't seen them since they were making out in the hall earlier," Mike says, unable to contain a smile.

"Only Puck and Kurt," Mr. Schue murmurs, shaking his head. "So duets? Any volunteers?"

"Matt and I could?" I suggest, glancing at Matt. He nods and we get up to sing. I would've don't a duet with Kurt, but he and Puck wanted to sing together, which I understood.

"Song selection?"

"Across the Universe."

"_Words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup,  
They slither while they pass, they slip away across the universe  
Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my open mind,  
Possessing and caressing me.  
Jai guru de va om  
Nothing's gonna change my world,  
Nothing's gonna change my world."_

Matt sings quietly. I figure he's nervous because no one has really heard his voice before.

"_Images of broken light which before me like a million eyes,  
That call me on and on across the universe,  
Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letter box they  
Tumble blindly as they make their way  
Across the universe  
Jai guru de va om  
Nothing's gonna change my world,  
Nothing's gonna change my world."_

I belt it out as usual, but try to contain myself for the next verse because we sing it together.

"_Sounds of laughter shades of earth are ringing  
Through my open views inviting and inciting me  
Limitless undying love which shines around me like a  
Million suns, it calls me on and on  
Across the universe  
Jai guru de va om  
Nothing's gonna change my world,  
Nothing's gonna change my world."_

We finish and everyone cheers. Brittany and Santana go next. They sing I'd Do Anything by Simple Plan. Then Mike and Quinn sing Dancing In The Moonlight by Toploader. That got everyone in the room dancing. Tina and Artie sing Love Me Tender by Norah Jones and make everyone emotional. Rachel and Finn sing Everywhere by Michelle Branch. They were good, but it was kind of sickeningly sweet. Then everyone begins pondering whether or not to hang out a bit incase Puck and Kurt show. Everybody secretly is really eager to hear them, even Rachel.

Kurt's POV

"This isn't my fault!" Noah says to me as we run down the hall, falling over each other.

"It totally is! You like cuddling too much. You made me lose track of time!" I yell, realizing we missed our turn. I drag him back and turn left. We sprint down the hall laughing and burst into the rehearsal room. We stand there for a second. I figure we must be some sight. My shirt only has two buttons done at the bottom and my tie is loosened half way. My chest and the majority of my stomach are exposed to the world. My hair is disheveled, I just know it. Noah's shoes are untied and his belt is only through three of the belt loops. He's wearing a sombrero for god sakes.

"You guys look. . ." Mercedes starts.

"Like you got mugged," Artie finishes.

"Sorry we're late Mr. Schuester," I say, buttoning my shirt. "It's Noah's fault."

"Is not!" he protests.

"Did I carry you into the janitor's closet? No. You carried me," I retaliate.

"Hey, you didn't exactly oppose it-"

"Why are you wearing a sombrero?" Finn interrupts Noah.

"What's the point in being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?" Noah states like that makes perfectly good sense. I just dismiss it.

"Mr. Schue is it our turn to sing?" I ask and he slowly nods, clearly confused by Noah and my relationship. Everyone is still getting used to it. "Okay then. Noah and I will be singing Anyone But You by Alexz Johnson."

"_Sick of the line that's fading me  
I never know what to believe  
In a world that's crushing me  
You're the only one I see"_

Noah's voice gives me chills. We sing the chorus together.

"_I don't change my mind for anybody.  
I won't waste my time on just anybody.  
I won't share my life...  
With anyone but you  
It's such a long way...  
With anyone but you  
I couldn't follow...  
With anyone but you  
Never anyone but you"_

I sing the next verse by myself, holding his hand in mine.

"_They put my poster on the wall,  
They watch and wait for me to fall,  
They think they made me who I am.  
Oh they don't know me at all."_

"_I don't change my mind for anybody.  
I won't waste my time on just anybody.  
I won't share my life...  
With anyone but you  
It's such a long way...  
With anyone but you  
I couldn't follow...  
With anyone but you  
Never anyone but you"_

He gets on one knee and looks deeply into my eyes to sing the next verse.

"_They build you up so high  
So you can hardly see the stars beneath your feet  
I'm falling through the cloud  
Then it'll be the next to catch me"_

I kiss him before we sing the chorus once more.

"_Ah, ah, ah  
With anyone but you  
It's such a long way..  
With anyone but you  
I couldn't follow...  
With anyone but you  
Never anyone but  
Never anyone but  
With anyone but you  
It's such a long way..  
With anyone but you  
And I couldn't follow...  
With anyone but you  
Never anyone but you"_

And then our friends cheer for us.

**Yes, this is the end. I'm sad too. **** This was a really fun mini series to write. Great practice for my next story. I know what you're thinking, "Another story? Oh tell me more!" Okay maybe you aren't thinking that, but I will answer the voice in my head anyway. I am writing another story! It's called I'm With You. It's a Puck/Kurt slash! Yay! Yay? Yay! Here is the link to the video I made for it.**

**.com/watch?v=ecQpyuMc4j8**

**If you have a Youtube account please comment on the video cause I worked really hard on it. Love, peace, and bendy straws 3**


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